A Horrible Crunching Sound

My favorite response so far to my Slate piece conflating Harry Potter and Tony Soprano comes from blogger Harry Pata, who patiently lists the reasons why my proposed ending to the series obviously wouldn't work at all:

"Do the Hippogriff" is non-canonical; if you're gonna parody the ending of the BOOKS, don't steal shit from the MOVIES.

Awesome.

Here's a little bit that was cut from the piece for space:

Harry was tired – tired of everything. He walked into the Three Broomsticks and took a seat in a booth near the back, still shaken by his visit earlier that day to Gilderoy Lockhart at St. Mungo’s Hospital – Lockhart, who nearly killed Harry once in the catacombs underneath Hogwarts, but was now demented and sad, with no memory of the power he’d once held.