Memory

To: robert_johnsons_bastard_son@therollingstones.com
From: agent@edvictor.co.uk
Subject: re: Outline Fuck Yeah
Date: 01 May 2007 09:00:26

Dear Keith,

I’ve read your proposed outline for the memoir, and I think it’s quite good, very vivid and detailed. I might ask that you really make an effort to cast your mind back and recall more stories from the short periods of your life of which you profess to have no memory at all. Specifically, are you sure you don't remember anything from 1956, 1957, 1959, 1961-1963, 1964, 1966, 1968-1972, spring 1973, 1975-1977, “the Eighties,” 1990-1993, New Year’s Eve 1996, 1999, 2000, or 2002 to the present? Even a quick anecdote of the smallest detail – a favorite shirt, some friendly words from a girlfriend, your entire Rolling Stones discography – could really help sell the book to editors. (We’ve done some research here and determined that you were born in 1943, so you shouldn’t worry about your lack of memories of the French Revolution; you weren’t even there!)

Best wishes,
Ed

PS Your gift arrived in the mail; it was far, far too generous, Keith. Also, the package was signed for by my assistant Sean, and the Royal Mail’s reported him to the police. Please do be careful in future about what you send to our offices.